I'm terrified. I'm scared of living a bleak existence. Of finding out, after all I've dreamed of and hoped for, that I made little to no impact on the world. Of being alone for the rest of my life. But most of all, I'm absolutely petrified that everything I love is the result of a trite, media-driven desire to be one of the indie realm's manic pixie dream girls. That I'll wake up and realize that I'm just a skinny-jean wearing, Zooey Deschanel-loving Penny Lane-wannabe. All of these things deserve to be loved in their own right, it's true. But I worry if I love them for the right reasons. Do I love them because they strike a chord with my soul, or because its the crowd I can fit closest with. Or because, at the end of all things, twilight and soft focus don't show all the flaws?
2 comments:
beautiful words. x
I tend to feel this way sometimes too. But we just have to realize that at the end of the day, you cannot hide who you really are. Perhaps you like these things for both of the reasons that you stated and I dont see anything wrong with that. Trying to find connections whilst trying to remain an individual can be more complex than some people might think. Just go with what your heart desires.
xx
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